I don’t really get to add much to this category of entries. So I’m happy to be back and also the sexy back…insert the joke.

In fact there have been multiple sexy things lately. Apparently twitter, one of my dogs won’t stop humping my other one, um some toys that maybe would blow your mind (see lelo), and writing, sexy writing. Yes I’m editing Ms Lily K. Cee and it’s sexy #2.

I had a really rather tragic relationship with sex as a young person. The church said it was wrong outside of marriage. But when does everyone’s bodies want to have sex? I’ll tell you—like late teens and twenties—when no one is married. And yes I did have sex outside of marriage and it messed up my brain and made me feel bad for a while. Then I got passed thinking it was evil and had a lovely time. Then I started to feel bad again…anti-depressants don’t help and thinking you’re not attractive is a real shit show when you need confidence.

Confidence, that’s the real answer. How do you get sex confidence? (Everything I think to type just sounds like inuendo) It’s fucking hard. Maybe putting yourself out there for the world to see and getting great feedback. Maybe reading sexy books helps (they do), but do I have the guts to let it all out there?

Well I wrote one paragraph and showed it to one person so….guts to be sexy, not really. It takes so much bravery to put yourself out there, even to your spouse sometimes. But what am I afraid of? Or any of us afraid of?

Dude I can name like 50 things—this is no get your shit together blog. This is the so many problems we are shit blog. And as far as I’m concerned, that’s okay, and maybe a little sexy.

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